Friday, May 20, 2011

all apologies

So, after the quake, Jesus comes back on his white horse. Is that before or after the 153 days in hell? I thought after the 153 days of hell on earth (hereforto known as HOE)there will be a big war - and then we have another chance to be granted into His Kingdom. God damn it, i'm so confused. Someone told me that probably HOE will most likely be Freshman year all over again. That'd be fine, if I could endure the man of dreams calling me names in front of all the cool people (yes, that actually happened) or if I could live through terrible skin and terrible teeth and really really short hair. I can't.
I *could* live through other things, like zombies and police randomly searching my house and crushing up dried bones for paste. I can do things like that. Hopefully, we won't have to, but listen here, I most definitely can survive HOE if it boils down to being a bad ass.
But seriously. I remember talking about the End Days when I went to a small country church in High School. I remember picking apart the Book of Revelations and talking about the Rapture and Hell on Earth and the big battle and how, after, Jesus will give us one more chance... if we can survive and admit our wrongdoings during the war. Or something along those lines. I don't remember exactly, but those are the keywords.
Anyway, my point is, the *end* of the world isn't tomorrow, it starts tomorrow.

I'm a little excited to see what happens. I mean, if I'm honest with myself, I know nothing is going to happen. The earth isn't ready for the end times, it's too young. Not to mention, human beings are going to bring about the end of the world, with this Mass Extinction we're causing - not a man/god who got beat up thousands of years ago. So, what about this Harold Camping? What will he do? What will his followers do when they find out that everything isn't as Harold Camping says? I predict that he says he did the math wrong...again. Just like he did in 1994. Or kill himself to save face. And his followers, maybe they'll realize that if they are going to be Christians they should follow Christ and not some old man who hates gay people and who hates abortions. I don't know just a thought

If it does happen, I know I'm not getting raptured. HOE is for me, I guess. I have two kittens who need me to take care of them. I just started growing grass for house plants, which I'm very excited about, I just did laundry - I at least want to dirty them up again. Also, my best friends will be here. And together, we'll learn how to live in the post-rapture world. And maybe it'll be fun.

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